1. |
Perceived Obsolescence
02:19
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i’m burning holes through my family’s history
taking what i can
and what do i have to give?
delusions of grandeur
so my ego grows
and then it snaps right back.
later there’ll be time for healthy restraint
but time, time eludes me
"give me some credit"
consuming all i can then i’m piling up the debts again
“oh but i need it”
you never needed anything but you’re still stretching, wasting, searching, screaming.
i’ll furnish my life
i’ll fetishise items that can make me happy
buy the things i need or think i need
but i’m still lonely
but i’m still on my own
my heart gives out when i think of their working day
the sacrifice they made for a better way
i’ve never worked as hard as you did then and still do now
to keep me grounded
and never missing out
it’s so clear now
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2. |
Cables
04:26
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you say “there’s more than this you know”
well at least i hope and think so
someone always feels a bit alone
but if we just keep on shouting loud enough
that what we’re having is the best time
we can start to think its true
look i know that i’m partied out
but you make me feel so boring
just want to get my hands round something real
like really real
not like lyrics in your skin
i want to run and laugh and talk and feel something
i want to get deep
like really deep
well maybe if we both learnt braille you could feel what i feel
or maybe we need cables to connect us
let’s start a grid
and everything unspoken can remain unsaid
but at least now understood
we struggle and stutter our way through our most sincere thoughts
failing to articulate
staring at the floor
where our half finished sentences fall down
making puddles on the floor
we wade our way through
we’re not all super confident
we get awkward and nervous and insecure
but that doesn't mean
our thoughts and opinions
mean any less
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3. |
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there’s a sadness in the family
the shouts they rip through these paper thin walls
little brother is quiet for a while
young mother says she can’t bear it all
as the father’s fists they hit the wall
the neighbours cower and turn up their tv
she’s a sensitive sort they say
this strong heart that slows fades
as she forgives more than she can take
because she never found the comfort
or the strength enough to leave
she finds no solace in religion
these cigarettes are her rosary
i fall back into my bed
and i try to read
because it’s the only escape that i've seen
and if these people are my family
what does that mean for me?
am i just another rat hanging around
with all these neighbourhood creeps
so little brother
where did you get the grace to be so proud?
did you not notice how your silence
drowns our screaming out
we’re screaming out
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4. |
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the familiar breaks
and i am left with open eyes
a rooftop fire escape
where i can see
how the economy laid waste
to everything that made this town strong
these kids will follow on
you set yourself adrift
a brother of distance
who left behind this maisonette
from the novels you wrote of an escape route
i never spoke as you walked away
i hid messages under the floorboards
words trapped in my throat
and some day these messages will be found
like stumbling across a forest in this forgotten town
i could never speak of these average tragedies
dear mother, i hope you hear this now
this poverty repeats
it's the shackles around your feet
you fight through the day
the memories
the weight
i hid messages
can’t let these buried words
remain unspoken and unheard
dig through the sorrow
and i wil try to understand
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5. |
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let the ice cold rain fall down
like a miserable sheet
all the pressure
the not so fresh air
is starting to get to me
when i saw you standing at the station
i turned and walked the other way
i hope you didn't see me
don’t take it personally
i just needed some time
looking at fields and trees
don’t take it personally
i just needed some time by myself
at the east midlands parkway
show me which way to go
it doesn't feel like going home
it feels like going away
sunset over cranes
never looked so beautiful
if i can make it through today
maybe i can learn how to survive
i will learn how to drive
and i will drive, drive, drive
without knowing where i’m going
or how to get home
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6. |
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come on and change my conscience
give me the confidence
where it taught you an excuse
a last ditch defence that you will over use
you feel this slow vibration in your chest
background noises fade
and we all feel like things just got lighter
and things just got easier
we get something different each time
we don’t own a single part
how it makes you wonder
a walk outside yourself
repeat it over and over
we don't own a single part
these noises pull you through
an old familiar tune
and our voices fill the room
and through these motions that could pass us by
we can find something to settle down our minds
we can find
something to settle our minds
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7. |
Borrowed Bikes
02:47
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we’ve got holes in our tyres
but we can ride on borrowed bikes
let’s hang out for a little bit
forget the weights on our minds
i long for beautiful existence
far away from politicians
far away from businessmen
you don’t feel like anything you say
you're sleeping off the weekend
i haven’t been outside all day
we never needed anything except abandoned parks
but no one wants to face the elements
after it gets dark
there’s an out of reach kind of sadness
found in the crumbling walls of disused buildings
dilapidated artifacts we’re not supposed to see
spat out by the quest for modernity
but it’s not just there
it’s everywhere
so take me to a landscape where i’m tiny
take me to the countryside
or float me out to sea
somewhere our insignificance can swallow me
i will sail on a boat
into the ocean
and i will float
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8. |
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lives of quiet desperation
punctuated by these little gestures
little signs you care
i saw the candles on the stairs
the fruit containing hidden messages
i saw the meal that took all afternoon
and even though
you drank yourself out of a simple conversation
i maintain
i made this bed and i know
that it's full of creases
and it's full of holes
but when i lie back
and close my eyes
it still feels comfortable
i don't want to give this a name
i don't want to speak the problem
i don't want to confront this pain
while there's something to hold on to
and anyway
it's too late for fresh air
in these smoke filled lungs
sometimes i feel like i'm making mountains
sometimes i feel
all alone in my family home
the silence beats shouting i guess
but they both have worn me out
another strong heart slowly fades
i know he's had it rough
we both have
i know he'd never hurt me
at least physically
history and geography
weight a heavy shadow over both of us
it's not like i blame him
and it's not just for the kids
i don't know what they get from this
so what it isn't perfect
perfection slipped away that night in 1985
my life's been 'making do'
not 'making dreams come true'
and i've been getting by just fine
i’ll talk myself around
three hundred and sixty degrees
i always end up
right back between these sheets
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9. |
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born out in a rightful rage
as the doctors and the nurses came
to clean up the blood
to give me a name
lost a couple of years to the state
then as i found my feet
i was taught my place
no future beyond the systematic restraints
hope was all wrapped up after failing the eleven plus
i found a silence in my mind
on a rooftop up high
where the polluted air would clear
i’d hold her pregnant stomach
smiling, looking over the north east sky
i took a job under the seafloor
blackened face and heavy arms
but when she took the country down
the easy way out
i found a bottle in which to drown
i lost a few more years of being a father
i couldn't find that silence again
no peace in the books or on the balconies
there were still some inspiring days
but there were months swallowed up by rage
and i can't justify the things that i never gave
…the sadness still looms in the family name
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10. |
Little Bit Of Unease
04:05
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a little bit of unease
leads to a head full of isolation
is my life a positive force?
that's the constant question
so mark your answer on a scale from 'good' to 'evil'
could it be that simple?
or are the axes marked 'productivity' and 'apathy'?
i've been dreaming about change
not just a soundbite revolution
myths of progress
and feelings of dissolution
and i've been dreaming
we stand staring at the void
curious of the mysteries
the universal complexities
am i alone?
no answer
the more i learn
the more i learn how much we don't know
is it enough to be trying?
i'm clouded by lessons
that feel so secondary
surrounded by luxuries
like the time to feel guilty
so wont you help me
find a piece of the problem i could solve
it's all so big, you see
yet i can't find the room to breath
i'm tumbling through fantasies
i'm getting lost in libraries
and i can't find the words or sentence structure
to carry all this weight
i had the strangest dream
we pinned these badges to our chest
and all the questions just left our mind
for we swore we had the answers
the more i learn
the more i learn how much we don't know
but the world still moves
so i'll follow suit
the world still moves
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11. |
Planned Obsolescence
04:38
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i’m haunted by ghosts of repetition
dreams of targets and machines
i'm haunted by dreams
echoing daily routines
but in a system built on fucking people over
In a system built on wearing people down
Is it any wonder that i’m struggling?
they say we’ve got it easy
say we’ve never had it tough
but don’t you listen when they say
“we should be grateful for a wage”
we are worth more
now everything breaks by design
to keep me buying
keep me striving for something better
keep updated, keep up
i just want to see
the beauty in the street
the beauty in the sky
they stole it from our eyes
find your feet
let the machines sleep
seek out the beauty in the street
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